[Sakura's place] [mini mini startu] * Taki shows up right when she said she was going to. * Taki knocks quietly at the door. The secretary waves cheerfully from behind the front desk as Taki walks in. "Go on back, she's waiting for you." Okay, thanks. * Taki nods at the Secretary before heading in. * Taki has her folder full of cards under her arm. * Sakura is in a bathrobe, toweling her hair dry. Hey, Taki, what's up? * Taki notices Sakura's state and blushes, turning around. Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't know you were in the middle of... of... Geez, Taki, I'm in a robe. ...I'm just running a little behind. I'm sorry. I don't mean to be a bother... I just... there's some stuff I'm unsure about... Welcome to life. ...sit down. How can I help you? * Taki sits uncomfortably in a nearby chair. I'm not sure that I'm cut out to be any sort of role model for the group. But... some of the girls are saying they look up to me and I don't know if they should... * Sakura makes a slight moue, which Taki can't quite interpret. * Taki looks up at Sakura questioningly. ...I have been putting you into leadership roles. And to be honest, you have more potential in this assignment than anyone - myself included - I can remember. It's not surprising that they can perceive that as well. Yeah, but... all I did was what I was supposed to on Monday. Nothing special... I've never been a leader before... I don't want to disappoint anyone. * Taki looks down again, her hair covering her face. You got into the fray, you kicked various ass, you mucked up the enemies' plan quite well. Yes, that's "what you were supposed to do", but it's also quite extraordinary. Kenji was useless. Leena was useless. Minami did okay, but her tactical sense wasn't fantastic. Darkmoon nearly killed himself. Kenji... It was my fault. I told him to go back there. I thought we'd see the enemy coming... Sure, but he should have adapted, once things started to happen. That's not your mistake, that's his. I was still responsible for him... No, Taki, *I* am. Huh? This is my team. You all are my responsibility. You're strong though... We only drag you down. * Sakura shakes her head. If I believed that, you wouldn't still be here. ... Really? * Sakura sighs. I thought the queen... I've been doing this for a long, long time, Taki. Four years... I've had nearly fifteen partners in that span. A lot of them didn't make it. You don't feel like you've let them down? ...but almost as many *were* useless. And I refuse to work with partners I can't trust. You... trust me? The Queen learned early enough not to make me keep the girls I rejected. * Taki nods. Sure, I regret those losses. Some of them were good friends. I still have my assignment, though. I wish I had your confidence... What confidence? I've been lucky, that's all. Yeah, but I don't think I could... after everything you been through... Every time you go out there, you tell yourself that it won't be today. And every time you go out there, you learn something new - you learn how to make the odds better for the next day. I hope - I pray that I can get you girls up to speed fast enough that you won't make the mistakes that my other partners have. Fear is healthy, Taki. Just don't let it be the only emotion you feel. I try not to be afraid... Or at least show that I'm afraid. * Taki shifts uncomfortably in her seat. Don't show the enemy your fear. Certainly. But if you worry some, it's just normal. ...but I think you know that already. Yeah. But I don't think it's good for anyone to see your weakness... Anyone at all? Well you never know who you can trust. I-- I mean... I didn't mean to say that I didn't trust you... If you're going to be paranoid, I suppose it's best to be comprehensive in your paranoia. But tell me - who on our team do you not trust? I... well. I don't really know any of them all that well. Maybe you should. But so far, I guess... They seem alright. Well Leena insisted on following me home and I got to talk with her a bit... It's not that I don't trust them, it's just that you know, I've had people lie to me and trick me before. Get to know them. They're watching your back, remember. If you're going to be paranoid, consider it scouting your potential betrayers. If you're more sensible, you'll make some friends. I have been uh... following them. Nothing serious. Just to see where they live and stuff. ...and I don't know where all you're coming from, but as a group, this bunch is as sincere, and even better, level-headed, as any - FOLLOWING THEM? Um... I mean... Um... I'm sorry. * Taki bows her head in shame. Don't apologize to me. Apologize to them. I wasn't going to do anything to them... I know that. It's just... oh, never mind. It's none of my business, unless it causes problems in the team. I'm sorry, I just wanted to know if they were bad people or not... * Sakura just shakes her head. I'm really sorry. Why can't I get the *normal* Ladies? ...don't answer that. I didn't mean to not be normal... ...you just want to be yourself. And that is normal. Or at least healthy * Taki looks down nervously. I said too much. I'm sorry. I didn't mean to be a bother. Hmmf. I'll tell you when I'm bothered. This is merely... interesting. Okay... * Sakura puts on a neutral face. So... How's Kenji's move going? * Taki looks down at the folder she brought. "Well he doesn't have very much stuff." I told him I'd still make dinner for him, if he wanted. That makes it easier, I suppose. Don't feel obligated to take care of him. ...if anything, he needs to learn to think for himself a little. I don't know if he'll be okay by himself. Have you ever heard of a Lord Superfluous? ...yes. I'm sorry, I asked you that on the phone, didn't I? ^^; I believe so. I mean, I asked Kenji about it and he said the Lord made Kenji for some experiment. And the project failed and he was buried in the queen's garden. If I understand what the Queen told me, *she* created him, while Superfluous... imprinted him. Sort of. But then he woke up a couple days before he was assigned to you. He woke and he was buried alive. And she didn't just bury him, she deconstructed him, and somehow he reformed and crawled his way out. But... he was alive. That doesn't seem right... ...I think I understand a little of the magical theory behind it, and it's all a little disturbing. But that's a long conversation about souls and destiny and we don't have nearly enough time to go into that. The really creepy bit is that he may actually *be* Lord Superfluous. Sort of. Maybe. Yeah, but he's not really together at all. I don't know if he'll ever be normal. That's why I'm scared to leave him on his own. Well, he just incarnated a couple weeks ago. Give him some time. You think he'll be okay? Absolutely no idea. * Sakura grins feebly. * Taki isn't sure how to respond to that. * Taki looks down confused. But... I mean... what if... *gently* What if what? What if he hurts somebody? ... Or gets hurt himself? Is it wrong to worry about him so much? ...if he hurts someone, we'll, uh, deal with it. If he gets hurt, then it's the same as if any of us were hurt. It's not wrong at all, Taki, it's perfectly normal. I'm never sure how I should be around him. I don't know if he needs a friend or a big sister or... I don't know what. Start with what makes you feel safe, then work on it from there. * Taki nods. * Sakura looks over at a clock. The others are going to be here pretty soon - was there anything else you wanted to talk about in private? Um... not anything that I can think of right now. Did you wanna see your card? *holds up her folder and smiles awkwardly.* ...nah. I have all of mine already. * Taki smiles a bit more and almost giggles. I have my secretary track down all of them. I didn't even ask for them, and now I'm in the card club... I thought that if we were assigned to a girl we wanted to know more about I could look up her card... or something. Heh. Well, sometimes the outside observers have something worthwhile to say. But mostly it's just amusing. I, for instance, am not a crook. [end mini]