Session Start: Fri Sep 16 20:04:10 2005 * Sakura snuck in the front door of the Agency and had a nice little conversation with the secretary, then managed to leave without attracting any attention. Well, almost. [Sunday, March 20, 2004 - 1820 local time] [mini start] * Taki notices Sakura leaving the agency and chases after her, abandoning her watch. Sakura? * Sakura is bike-less today, and had been trotting around the corner to the train station. Ah, well, no escape plan is perfect. You... weren't even going to say hi? * Sakura turns around. She's in a thick black overcoat, with something slickly shiny pink peeking through underneath, and probably a skirt, since it's just her bare legs coming out of the bottom of the coat. I... well. I didn't want to have to answer too many difficult questions. * Taki is dressed a bit more casually than she would like for such an encounter. She's in her black longcoat with just a t-shirt and black jeans on underneath. Like what? Like how Lady Peavine is doing. Like can Leena have a motorcycle. Oh. Well I can imagine how she's doing. And I figured it's just better not to argue with Leena about the motorcycle thing... But um, it would be nice to see you and stuff. I always worry about what you're doing... * Taki looks down and blushes a bit. I... * Sakura looks at her hands. It's hard doing this by ourselves... I have no idea what I'm doing these days. I mean, I'm doing security for the Palace, and managing Her Majesty's crying fits, and acting as Squeej's backup, and running interference for you guys, and there's my territory... Sounds hard... I guess you wouldn't have much time for us then... Hard doesn't really describe it. I'm running from one fire to another, but there isn't really anything that's *hard* about it. And no, there doesn't seem to be much time. Even for you guys. Though... I guess that just means you're good at it. I wish I could say it was easy for us too... Though? * Sakura sits down on a bench in the train station. * Taki looks at it for a moment before deciding to sit down too. Things just weren't supposed to be this way. What way? I wasn't supposed to like you kids this much. You-- I mean, what's wrong with that? Well, I wasn't expecting you'd all live this long, either. Oh. So then you didn't want to get close to us? That was the plan. Then... well, there was another plan, too, but let's not talk about that one. ... Alright. Maybe... Maybe that's why I did get close to everyone. Because I thought we weren't suppose to live that long in this job... Everyone reacts differently. That's what being human is. * Taki nods. "Yeah..." It's weird you know, getting use to having friends... I had friends... once... ...shit. ... What? What happened? I'm feeling sorry for myself for the first time in years, and I'm feeling guilty about it because I have no right to. I've done what was needed, I've done what was important, I even managed to do what was RIGHT once or twice, and what I've gotten from it should be enough. ... I've been feeling the same way lately. I mean, doing what's right is supposed to be enough, isn't it? Then why does it hurt so much? Because it's just never enough. * Taki sniffs. "Why can't it be? I just don't understand..." Because, as long as the war goes on, as long as we have enemies that can deny us rest and deny us a place in the world, none of us can move on. ... I wish that didn't make so much sense. What happens when this all ends though? Do we get to just go home? I don't know. Maybe what we're fighting for is a chance to define home for ourselves. ... I'm sure my parents don't like me being a part of all this. I haven't spoken to my parents in a few years. I didn't try to explain any of it... and frankly I don't think they could handle it. I tried to explain to mine. I think they agreed to let me stay only because they could talk me out of it... Maybe they thought you could learn something here. Maybe they were proud of you. Maybe they could understand. ... I don't think I've done anything to be proud of... I've failed to save so many people... You've done pretty well. The team's record is better than mine ever was. I... I just... Is it all about numbers? I want to be able to save everyone. I don't want anyone to get hurt. They shouldn't. It's not right! * Taki is trying really hard not to let herself cry. Of course it's right. You're a magical girl, not some god. You didn't make the world, you just have to live in it. But... But I should've been able to save her. I tried... there just wasn't enough time. * Taki sniffles again. * Sakura puts an arm around Taki's shoulders. "If there wasn't enough time, then there wasn't enough time. It's not bad to mourn. What is wrong is blaming yourself... it just takes time to learn that." But I miss Sanako so much... * Taki finally lets her eyes start to fill with water Sanako... Lady Chopsticks? That attack on the school shouldn't have happened... I should've seen it coming... No... Lady... I never got her name. I didn't even know for sure she was a Lady until she died. She was my friend at school... Mmmm. * Taki leans over onto Sakura's shoulder and just cries. * Sakura turns and holds Taki, unconcerned about the public scene. * Taki sobs for a good long while before she tries to stop herself. ... Sakura? * Sakura lets go, but stays close. "Hmmm?" Um... thank you... * Taki stays close as she looks up into Sakura's eyes. * Sakura blinks. You're welcome. * Taki takes a deep breath and closes her eyes. * Taki leans up and kisses Sakura on the lips. * Sakura blinks again, then kisses back for a few seconds. She pulls away, then leans forward, pecks Taki on the forehead, and hugs her again. ...Taki... I'm just not wired that way. ... I'm sorry. Don't be. * Taki blushes mightily and tries to dry her eyes in spite of the fact that she's still crying. I shouldn't have... I mean... I know... But... * Taki only makes herself cry harder. You had to find out though... shh... sshhh... I--I--*sob* I-- God, this sucks so much! I didn't ask for this! It just sorta happened... * Taki gives up trying to wipe off her eyes and just lets them fill with water. None of us ask for any of this. None of us deserve it. But we still are alive, and we can still go on. But don't want to go on. I just want to be here forever... *lays her head back down on Sakura's shoulder* No, you don't. You don't want to be sad on a train platform forever. But what if it doesn't get any better? How do we know when any of this is going to end? That's just life, Taki. You could be run over by a car tomorrow. I could have a heart attack. The Ningyo might invade and flood the entire city. The Americans could decide to turn on us. All we can do is what we can do. Every person in the world lives on those terms. Don't you dare tell me you're not at least as good as them. Yeah. *sniffles again* I suppose so. * Taki leans back up. "I'm sorry I got your clothes all wet..." Don't worry about it. You weren't like going anywhere important, were you? * Sakura takes Taki's hand. "Not as important as this." * Taki blushes a bit at the touch and the comment. "Thank you again. I probably don't deserve someone as nice as you..." You deserve a lot more than I can give you. * Taki blushes even more. "I couldn't imagine wanting anymore..." I mean, uh... um. I'm sorry. * Taki looks down again. * Sakura lets go of her hand. "Stop. Stop being sorry, stop belittling yourself. It's not healthy, it's not right." You have so much to be proud of. But... I-- I'm just trying to be good enough. For you and everyone. It's so hard to be someone to be proud of. Don't try to be good enough. Just be as good as you are. I think that will be more than enough. * Sakura stands. "Are you going to be okay?" * Taki swallows. "I ... think so." * Taki tries to smile. Her tears have mostly dried by now. * Taki stands as well. I hope you don't think I'm weird for liking you... Oh, no, I'm flattered. * Taki blushes. "Really?" Yeah. * Taki smiles at that in spite of herself. * Sakura shrugs. "If I were... but I'm not." Yeah, I figured... I just. I don't know. I'm making it up as I go along. Good enough. Good enough. [end mini]