[Day: Thursday, June 19th. Time: 1:45am] (Late enough for ya?) (Sure.) [We meet up with Heinrick who still seems to be up. Not only up, but it doesn't seem like he's slept a wink. The lights in the lab are dimmed so as not to disturb anyone else who might be sleeping at this time, but Heinrick is still there, inspecting some of the chemical formulas he has available. Heinrick has done a fair job keeping it neat and tidy as he checks under a microscope, carefully adjusting it.] [Mini start.] * Heinrick keeps looking at his materials in his little corner. Sadly the lab is far from adequate for his needs, but he seems to be utilizing the space in the best way possible. * Keiko drifts into Heinrick's labspace silently, a long blue cloak over a long blue dress. She doesn't say anything, instead just floating an inch off the ground in the dimmed light, letting Heinrick do his work. Her arms are wrapped to hug herself under the cloak. Her hair is braided down her back. * Heinrick glances over his shoulder slightly, instinctively and notices Keiko out of the corner of the eye. He then turns back to his work, "You should probably be asleep." * Keiko replies, softly, "Luana was thinking the same thing." * Keiko looks to the side. "Not really working out." * Heinrick lets out a long sigh and straightens up from his work. "No, I suppose not." He sets the microscope off to the side then starts looking over another vial. "I suppose I am not one to talk in this instance though." * Keiko replies, quietly, "No, you are not." * Heinrick pinches the bridge of his nose slightly as he looks over the vial. "For what it is worth, I apologize for the order earlier. It may have been the quickest way to calm you down but it was certainly far from the best..." He rubs his nose some more. "It is..rather difficult to draw the line though." * Keiko snorts lightly and looks aside. "If you'd do it again, don't apologize." She's silent a moment, then replies, "In a few weeks, you won't even have to worry about it." 'Course, then I might be able to kill you. Guess there's tradeoffs. * Heinrick chuckles slightly and holds the chemical up to the light better. "Would you think I deserve death?" * Keiko mms, then says, quietly, "Haven't decided. Other things to keep my wits about." * Heinrick puts the vial away and just stands there a bit, responding off-hand. "Well enough." He shakes his head. "Whether it comes by your hand or something else does not matter much I suppose. Although it would be an intriguing choice to make on your own for the first time." * Heinrick turns around and gestures slightly. "But I'm sure you did not come down to talk about this." * Keiko is silent a moment, then, "I didn't... come to talk about anything. I don't sleep well. You should know that." Luana's asleep, and she needs it. Togo's giving her a future. Jamie's... Jamie. Don't know what Rose is thinking now. * Heinrick sighs slightly and actually seems a bit regretful as he does it, letting just a trace of emotion touch his face. "Neither do I..." * Keiko looks at him strangely, then replies, "Of course you don't." * Keiko pulls out her duck and pets it a little. "Maybe she cares that she helped kill Jamie. Maybe not. Togo... is worried about everything but that." * Heinrick nods slightly and sits down. "If it wasn't her, it would have been another." * Keiko snorts, and replies, "It would always be another. Are we responsible for nothing? * Keiko then says quietly, "Are we?" * Heinrick chuckles slightly, then looks up at the ceiling. "I did not say that. We're all mired in sin, Keiko. I've long given up any hope for atonement." He closes his eyes slightly. "Though...it would be nice, just once, not to corrupt one thing I touch." * Keiko looks over at him and says, "You get me in that, I suppose." She pets her duck. "What more could you have done." I came to you a monster, and I will leave you a monster, if I live that long. * Heinrick raises an eyebrow slightly at her. "Do you really wish Blitzkrieg to win like that?" * Keiko looks at him oddly, shudders, then replies quietly, "Blitzkreig... never made me worse. They just... made me theirs. For a time." * Heinrick sighs slightly then looks back at the ceiling. "It wouldn't make sense for a monster to convince another monster that she isn't one, now would it?" * Keiko half-smiles, then the smile slips away. "It is if you want to think you didn't corrupt something." * Heinrick rubs the bridge of his nose. "We can wish to think all we would like. It is only helpful if we are able to think the truth." * Keiko sets her feet down on the ground and looks up at him. "What truth?" I wish I knew any better than you did. The truth...will be whoever is the victor in this battle, I suppose. That is how it tends to be. But believing that defeating the organization will make things better is a pipe dream. * Keiko is silent a moment, then adds, "There is always another organization." * Heinrick nods and sighs. "Sometimes, I think you were cursed to be one of the most intelligent of the wards...it would have been easier on you if you hadn't been able to figure this out on your own." * Keiko actually laughs weakly, then shakes her head and says quietly, "I have a lot of time to think when I can't sleep. To dance on the edge of losing what... soul I might have?" * Keiko then glances up to him. "Time to be poetic. That happens at night, you know." * Heinrick smiles for a second and then loses it. He nods silently. I'm afraid I could not help you there. I'm not certain what soul I have left. * Keiko looks back at him, then looks away. "Have you... known that you could do the worst wrong and the world, and yet... sometimes wished it with all your heart?" * Heinrick chuckles and looks down slightly. "Worst? The worst is all dependent on our perspectives..." He then shakes his head slightly. * Keiko replies quietly, "Maybe, but you must have at least as much as me." * Heinrick then looks at her and goes silent for a moment. Then looks off to the side. "Perhaps so." He takes in a breath. "Despiration, compassion, love, makes people do strange things." As does fear, despair, regret. * Keiko looks down and replies quietly, "Not so strange." Common, really... Human almost. * Keiko then looks back up at him and repeats, "Almost, yes." * Heinrick shakes his head. "Wrongs in the world...tend to feel fake and hollow once you actually get it." * Keiko tilts her head. "Hollow?" * Heinrick chuckles and looks at her. "I thought I knew what I wanted when I tried mine. Now...I'm not so sure." * Keiko mms softly. After a few moments, she replies, flatly, "I can't quite envision you wanting something that much." * Heinrick gives a half-smile, but it seems somewhat forced. "I suppose it is difficult to see, isn't it?" * Keiko replies, "You are in your fortress whenever you can be." She looks aside. "I have little room to talk, perhaps." I... guess I have emotions, now. It feels like it's been forever. * Heinrick takes in a deep breath. "Your past...ages you in a different way, I suppose." He then looks at her for a moment, then away. "Is that something you wanted?" * Keiko looks back to him, then, "They're... mine. I like things that are mine." * Keiko pets her duck. "They are the best things in the world." And ones that you know are yours? * Keiko is silent a moment, then nods slowly. "I can't live as ice. But fire will destroy me if I blink." What of earth and air? * Keiko tilts her head at him. "Nobody is earth or air. Not when they're alive." Perhaps... * Keiko rubs her stomach a moment, murmuring, "Dead, they are always earth or air. Still, solid, yielding, ephemeral." * Heinrick adjusts his glasses and stands up to go back to his work. "Fire only destroys if it is overfed though. Fed properly, it can create warmth." * Keiko murmurs, "For a time." * Heinrick chuckles. "It is your choice. I thought you liked things that were yours." * Keiko is silent a moment, then says quietly, "Some things... will never be mine." * Heinrick picks up one of the chemicals and stops for a moment, holding them. "I would say something but I have the feeling you are referring to something in particular." * Keiko replies quietly, "Yes." * Heinrick waits for a moment for her to answer if she will. * Keiko is silent a long time before she whispers a little shakily, "She is beyond my grasp. As... it should be." * Heinrick stops at that and then responds. "For what it's worth, I'm sorry." * Keiko bites her lip, then shakes her head, murmuring quietly, "For what? I didn't deserve her. I don't deserve either of them." * Heinrick looks at Keiko for a moment. "Why not?" * Keiko pets her duck as she trembles, then says quietly, "If I deserved them, I would have them." * Heinrick shakes his head and starts pouring chemicals. "It would be nice if the world worked that way, wouldn't it?" * Keiko replies, "No." I suppose I cannot really tell you what you do deserve. The only one who can tell you that is you. * Keiko snorts, then looks away. "The world has already decided for me. I could have been a shaman. Now I'm... just a fool." * Heinrick snorts. "Funny. You don't look dead." * Keiko replies, with a weak smile, "I'm bleeding out. It's really subtle." If I could find a way to reverse the process, I would. But...it's very doubtful... So your choices will simply have to be important. * Keiko looks back at him a moment, then murmurs, "It is funny. I was grounded because I hurt myself too much. I suppose they just wanted me to die on their schedule." * Heinrick keeps working. He's listening but not responding. * Keiko takes back off into the air slightly. After a moment she says quietly, "Thank you, I suppose." * Heinrick shakes his head. "I admit that I am not...easy to talk to. But if you do need it, I will try to listen." * Keiko shakes her head slightly, then replies softly, "I... wish listening would matter. I just need... I don't want to be awake anymore." * Heinrick smirks. "I could chloroform you if you'd like." * Keiko is silent a moment, then asks, "Will I have to wake up?" * Heinrick sighs. "Sadly yes. Hopefully one day it won't be into a nightmare." * Keiko shakes her head, "Then I lose either way. I'd... rather suffer awake." Everyone's safer when I'm awake. Very well. Would you like to help? * Keiko floats over to him and asks, "How?" * Heinrick points to a couple of vials at the other end of the counter. I need to seperate those into 3 seperate vials so I can test some different mixtures..." * Keiko floats over, asking as the vials lift off, "An even split of seperate vials for each?" That would be good, yes, though it's not necessary. It would help make certain that I don't have one amount overconcentrated though. [Mini end!]