[SHUTS UP THE OOC NOW! IT IS TIME FOR TEH SUPER OST CRAZY FUN JOY SEASON!] (YAAAAAAAY!) (Yay!) (What is this 'joy' you speak of?) (It's a kind of Pocky) (Fun? Who's fun? Whose idea was it that this is fun?) [Scene: The last thing you remember...the last thing you remember ...is a dream. The four of you find yourselves standing ankle-deep in a depression filled with a reddish-brown sludge. A large column towers from the side of the depression, and the landscape stretches away into the mountains. It is a dry land (aside from the sludge). You can make out a narrow path leading from the depression towards the mountains. There is a faint scent in the air...the scent...of oregano.] [Start!] (We have entered the realm of the marinara.) EWW SLUDGE! (Damn it, Ro figured out my first huge plot point. ): ) (You can interact now, y'knows. Or describe, or whatever.) * Telion trudges through the sludge, picking up his boots as he does so with a 'squirsh' sound, glancing down and shaking the sludge from his boot. "Well. They say any landing you can walk away from is a good one. Only, somehow I don't remember landing. Weird." * Kirie picks her small sailor fuku clad form from the sludge and tries to wipe it off. To all appearances she's a 14 year old Japanese girl. And so so cute. * Sayura is standing already, and wading his way out. Once he reaches dry, flat land, he double checks the rifle strapped to his back - pretty quickly. He looks youngish, human - and he's wearing a kilt and a camo vest, that's loosely open. * Ten discovers herself to be knee deep in sludge, which probably means that her boots and her dress are absolutely RUINED! She flails her tiny arms for a moment and then pops out of the mud to hover a few feet above it. She, for all intents and purposes is a small winged doll, and moving on its own. THIS IS ICKY! You! *she points at Telion* Carry me out of here! NOW! Ewwwww, it's all over everything! * Telion is a human-type early 20s type person, with dirty blond hair and slight freckling on his cheeks in a loose-fitting vest/pants/silvery boots combination. He has a long metal band across his shoulders and what seems to be several packs around his sides and his back as well as a longer metal band protruding along his back. He looks up at Kirie. "Uh. How about no?" * Sayura then calmly waits for the others to get out and quit their bitching. [You were all standing up in the first place, mind. Sorry about that.] * Kirie pouts extra cutely. But but but but... pretty please? You know...you could just stand up. I am! But it's still on my shoes and all sticky and gross... * Ten stops trying to brush the sludge off with her hands when she realizes there are other people around. "Like, whups. Hi! I'm Ten, but if anybody asks you later, you so never heard of me, kay?" And it's on mine too. *sighs* And I just got these boots too after the last disaster... I know. I'm Sayura. I'm Kirie! Where are we? Same conditions. * Kirie looks around. Hey mountains! * Telion turns towards Ten and stares at her for a moment before saluting. "Right! Never heard of you. Never had anyone ask even. And if anyone asks about me, you've never heard of me either! Actually, I've never heard of me!" He rubs his head. "No wait, that don't make sense..." I dunno, my Gee Pee Ess is on the fritz! * Kirie pulls out her cell phone and checks the reception. ( The GPS will work when we get to the world map. ) What's a "Gee Pee Ess"? [Zero reception! It's like you're on another planet or something!] [A little "Roaming..." icon does pop up, though.] * Sayura looks Up, then points there. "I doubt it's your GPS. It's the satellites." * Telion digs through one of his hip-packs and pulls out what looks like a futuristic PDA and flips up the cover, starting to enter and check coordinates and look up. "Huh." Stupid phone! They said it was supposed to work anywhere! Like, I haven't been tossed into some alternate dimension that's ruled by crazed elves who want to steal peoples' souls and give bad fasion advice, have I? I'm not supposed to talk to people there. I'm gonna get my money back. I've never seen these stars, and they're certainly not anything close to earth. * Kirie stomps off towards the mountains. Do you guys know where the nearest cell phone store is? * Telion looks at Sayura. "Earth? Why would anyone still want to live *there*?" * Ten shakes her head. "Nope! I so don't know where we are, but if we find out, I could tell you!" From what I hear, Earth's just a smog-filled and disgusting place. I mean you can hardly move to breathe. Like...eww." Earth is awesome! You guys are dumb. [A voice from up in the sky speaks. "No, there are no crazed soul- stealing fashion elves here. Or cell phones, I'm afraid."] * Sayura starts chuckling even before Telion starts saying anything. Earth gets better reception. * Ten spins in the air to look at Telion. "Oh wow, you're like, from the future, right? Is the future awesome?" Annnd...skirt girl continues to make friends. How wonderful for her. I'm from the present. * Telion blinks at Ten. "I'm not from the future. I'm from the now. I mean, my now. But like...err.." He rubs his head. "This is so confusing. This isn't E3?" (What direction is everyone facing? The path?) (Ten's facing Telion) I'm sure you'd make a pretty present for a petty warlord. * Kirie is heading towards the path. I dunno where this is, but there's a giant voice in the sky! * Sayura is sideways, with both the path and the people in sight. * Ten helpfully points up! * Telion looks up at the sky, squinting. "Apparently." What voice? * Kirie looks up? * Telion squints some more. "Neo Terra? No..." [The ground on the side of the depression not facing the path rumbles slightly. The column that was there moves!] * Kirie wasn't facing that way and thus keeps walking. Neo what now? * Telion takes in a breath. "Breathable atmosphere though. That's surprising." New Earth? He's so from the future! That's awesome, I think I'm supposed to, like, get sports scores or something if this ever happens. Why wouldn't we be able to breathe? We're not in space or something. * Telion finally puts away his PDA, looking down at his pack. "Neo Terra. It was one of the first great human colonies before the damned porkers took over." * Sayura stands the moment the rumbling stops, rifle held loosely. He tucks the rifle away and pulls out a small pistol. The what now? They teach you that in grade school. Haven't they taught you *anything*? [The column lifts into the air and comes back down. Three more columns appear out of the clouds and move forward, standing in front of you on the path. They do this with surprising speed.] I'm still learning math and English and history and junk. I dunno, but maybe the futures gonna suck, and, like, stuff's happening now! * Telion makes a slight face. "Well...not the porkers part..." What the heck are those things? * Sayura responds impassively to Ten. "Be glad it's only a maybe for you." * Kirie goes over to inspect one closer. (What kind of inspecting is she doing?) Kaaaaay! * Kirie looks and maybe pokes. * Sayura looks at the columns and gives them a once-over. [The column in question shudders a bit, and a snorfling sound comes from above. The columns! Are brownish-grey with odd whorly lines on them.] * Ten internally bemoans her total lack of advanced sensor equipment. Are these things alive? They're kinda weird for trees... * Sayura looks up a moment before the snorfling at where it comes from. [They lower slightly somehow, and what you thought were clouds lower until you can see that they weren't clouds at all.] What's happening? Huh? Huh? Huh? I don't know! [Everyone roll: Biological Science: Prehistoric Earth!] This doesn't look like Japan at all. [Just kidding.] * Telion glances at Kirie. "What's Japan?" Japan is a country. On Earth. Where I'm from? Yep! [As they lower, the "clouds" seem to be some sort of fluffy material draped around the body of what, to anyone who can recognize it, looks like a miniature (for the scale they were supposed to be) Apatosaurus.] It's a dinosaur! How do you not know what Japan is? It's a dinosaur that's my size! Awesome! Oh. Well, I'm from Laboratory #EX572, E3 Colony. Oh, and my name is Telion. Telion Salamander. Pleased to meet you. Do you think we could ride it? Because he's from the future, duh. [It's about 15-20 feet tall, maybe taller--you can't quite tell.] * Telion just stares at Ten oddly when she mentions "the future" because he just doesn't see it. If you're from the future... um... Who wins American Idol? [It cocks its head curiously at Telion, and licks its lips.] What's an American? >< America is another country! Hey look it's gonna eat you! Oh wow, they canceled that show ages ago! That means I'm from the future too! I'm awesome! * Kirie tries petting it. Well what parts of it she can reach. * Telion looks up at the creature and backs away. "Uh. Is that thing going to eat me? An extraordinary large number of things have been trying to eat me lately." Why is everyone from the future? I wanna be from the future! [It then winces, as though berated, and makes the snorfling noise again as Kirie starts to pet it.] Maybe you're just from the past. I'm not from the past I'm from the present! * Sayura rubs his head. "Your pointless questions are twice as annoying as they would be normally. And relax. It's not going to eat you." No. I'm from the present. You're from the future to the dinosaur! ["Stop it, Floomy! Stop it, I say!" It's The Voice From The Sky again, but the dinosaur's mouth isn't moving!] If you were from the present, you'd know what Japan is. * Ten nods to herself! She makes a valid point. That...floating doll thing. She's missing the point. The present is a relative term. You're a relative term! [The Voice clears its...er, makes a throat-clearing noise. A "pay attention to me, I think I'm important!" throat-clearing noise. "Excuse me, please!"] Well, *that's* a snappy comeback. * Sayura rolls his eyes. "That was even stupider the second time." Like, I think the voice in the sky kinda wants to talk to us an stuff. * Kirie looks up again. "Helloooo?" It's not going to be as vapid as current company. Let it talk. * Telion looks up at the sky. "Can you get rid of this sludge please? It's kinda... sticky." [The dinosaur lowers its head as well, and you can see what seems to be a giant potato floating a few inches over it. "Hello, there, young...entities!"] Ooh a potato. * Kirie goes to poke it. (Did I mention this wasn't going to be serious?) It has eeeeeeyes... ( Yes. ) It's going to eat me! [The dinosaur quickly raises it just out of poking range] (Did I mention I'm a 14 year old Japanese schoolgirl? :P) * Ten blinks. "I didn't know potatos could talk, did you know potatos could talk?" Hey! Bring it back! ["I'm sorry, young entity, I'm afraid it's for your own good."] No. Potatoes don't talk. *pause* Not even in the "future." * Kirie jumps trying to reach it. What is? ["If you were to touch me, your skin would slough off into a thousand thousand of thousands of pieces, and then catch on genetic fire, which would pass on to all of your ancestors and descendants, if applicable."] But, but, but, it's right there! Why? Sadly, she won't test it. ["It's one of those pesky curse things."] * Ten moves _away_ from the potato. Isn't a thousand thousands a million? ["We don't believe in that term here."] Wah! Burn and melting and frying and burning is baaaaaaaaaad! Magic smoke goes on the inside! Huh. Why are we here? ["Anyway, I suppose you're all wondering why you're--ahaha. Yes. That."] To talk to the potato, obviously. ["Well, it seems that wherever you were standing in your respective continuums was a dimensional weak point. Therefore, when the summons happened, you were drawn into it and brought here."] Wow. * Telion scratches his head again. "That, um, sucks." I was at the mall! ["I apologize for the tomato-based oregano and basil sludge. I don't know why that's there either."] How is the mall a dimensional weak point? Oooooh wow, so, it totally doesn't matter if anybody knows I'm alive here. That's awesome! ["Who knows?"] ["Anyway, anyone here read adventure novels?"] * Ten does a loop. Read? Like not at school? I play adventure games! Does that count? It so should. Novels? ["Actually, it does."] * Sayura shakes his head. "Stories, and experience." Yay! Oh. Like on C-file? [The potato shudders, as if in rage. "Bah! Have you all been exposed to the archetype of the quest narrative!"] C-what now? This sounds like creepy otaku stuff. So, like, is this a fetch quest, or a grind, or do we gotta go do something? Fetch quest, damsel in distress, follow the yellow brick road, or follow the people who know just enough to get you to the next location? Computer file. They shortened it because it's just so much easier. You push things on the touch pad and voila. Words. * Ten nods at Sayura. Yep! ["Option 'gotta go do something,' I'm afraid."] I know what a computer is. * Kirie sticks her tongue out. Kaaay! What've we gotta do for you Mr. Talking Potato of Burny Dooom? What if we don't want to? So let me get this straight. You're going to tell us what to do to get outta here. ["Follow Floomy, please. And try not to tickle it any more, it is very sensitive. I will explain on the way. There is no time to lose! Except for that which we've already lost."] * Telion glances at Kirie oddly. "You do? You seemed so ignorant of the other places, I thought...huh. Guess the past is less primitive than I thought." Aww, if this was Nullsun, I've got an item that sometimes gives you time back on a quest. I wasn't tickling I was petting! And I'm not primitive >< ["Oh, when you've done as you must the dimensional elasticity will send you all back home. If you don't, the counterbalance will grow and you'll all be destroyed from the inside because you will have never existed, since the dimensional complex will rewrite itself around you."] You asked me to pick you up without even knowing me. I'd say *that's* rather barbaric, wouldn't you? WAAAAAAAAAAH! I don't wanna be unexisted! I'm too awesome to be unexisted and I refuse to get killed wearing a dress covered in pasta sauce! Why can't you do it? * Sayura winces. Twice. [The dinosaur turns around and begins to lumber off down the path. A bird about three feet high is standing on its tail, and waves to you. "Hello! I am an Apteryx, a wingless bird with hairy feathers."] * Telion looks at the giant space potato. "Did it just say...never existed?" YES. TWICE. * Telion waves to the Apteryx. "Hello, needless narrative!" ["Oh, that's not within my power construction."] * Ten flails. "More going and less getting unexisted!" Hi bird thing! * Kirie moves to poke it instead. [The Apteryx gets poked. It bursts into tears.] What? [Silent, but vehement tears.] I didn't even do it that hard. * Sayura is matching Floomy's stride as best he can. What a big baby. Like, I think you hurt its feelings. You should apologize or something. Kirie? Don't touch anything or I'll feed you to the potato. I was curious! ><# (Yes you can almost see the emoticons on her face.) [It curls up and goes to sleep on the tail. A sigh comes from the potato, which goes to hovers above it. It has no facial features, but it seems to be sort of frustrated at the apteryx. "..well, so much for getting it to do my work for me."] I didn't do it! * Telion heads after the Floomy right quick. You so did. You poked it right in the feathers! * Ten floats along. * Kirie walks and talks at the same time because she's awesome like that. * Kirie pokes Ten. "See? You're not crying! * Ten gets poked. "Hey! What'd you do that for? You coulda gotten more sauce on you!" I poked a non-sauce spot. ["Anyway. Here's the situation. I am the Baron de von del Swifflesweeper. I'm the landowner around these here parts. Not much land, but what can you do?" It mutters under its breath. You can hear snatches of "playing second spud to that spoiled snit of a scion" and suchlike before it regains its composure.] And I was just showing you what I did. * Kirie raises her hand. But, like, maybe he's not as awesome as I am at getting poked! I mean, if I was all shy that'd have been bad! ["The one good and or prosperous thing about this barren wasteland is that it holds the--yes, what?"] Why do you have a lot of spaghetti sauce? * Telion looks at Kirie. "Do you have to poke everything you see?" * Sayura nods, and recites with it, 'spoiled snit of a scion.' ["I have no idea. It must have come through the dimensional weak points as well."] There's nothing wrong with poking. * Kirie looks at Telion. "So do they have a lot of spaghetti sauce in the future?" It's annoying. And believe me, I know annoying. When you have an alien screech its name in your mind that's 20 syllables long, then you'll understand. That's hardly the same as poking. Sometimes things just need to be poked. ["This land is home to a natural wellspring of dimensional fluctuations. Also, some natural history museums, genetic splicing labs, and a restaurant that does a fantastic rack of lamb." Anyone up closer to Floomy's front can see it lick its lips at that.] You eat lambs?! That's so mean! No. But it'd make me a good judge of annoying. Anyways, no, we tend not to have much spaghetti sauce. Tomatoes don't grow too well, except on certain colonies. ["Only dead ones."] But, like, they're supposed to be tasty, but, like I didn't get to try any when I could eat. Poor lambs... * Kirie sniffles. * Ten pouts a bit and then gets over it. I'm used to these. * Telion digs through his pack and holds up a silver wrapped pouch. * Sayura frowns. "Dimensional fluctuations.. genetic labs... you've got access to a lot of genetic material through different dimensions then." ["Unfortunately, due to...quantum, there was a breakout at the major genetic splicing lab, CorpoTech. Some specimens achieved consciousness, formed a rebel army, and attacked, stealing the codes that keep the dimensional wellspring at bay."] Ooooh, that sounds bad. ["Indeed."] Why'd they do that? ["They're rebel armies. Who knows why?"] * Sayura says while he says that, " ... and you made something that got away." ["Good entity! I'm no splicer. I own land, not science!"] Quantum. It's ALWAYS quantum. You didn't ask them? They were kind of rebelling. Hmm. We should so ask them when we get there! Okay! * Telion tears open the pack and 'eats' as he thinks. ["Now, the wellspring is close to its breaking point, as our failsafes begin to fail. It's all very tragic and sad and all that rot."] Obviously. * Kirie eyes Telion snacking and pulls out her own box of pocky, idly munching on a couple sticks. * Kirie offers one to Ten cause she seems nice. Why are they doing that? * Ten smiles at Kirie. "Like, sorry, but I can't eat!" I'm sure they're heartbroken and distraught over the fact that they were lab babies all this time. At all? Are you on a diet? ["Internecine warfare has decimated the ranks of the rebel genetically-spliced armies, and they are in disarray. This division was due to the death of their leader, who, before its death, hid the codes in a structure filled with cunning traps and vicious riddles. None of my people have succeeded. And none of the rebels have, either."] Well, like, once I got body swapped with a woman once, and then I could eat, but I'm just a machine you know? It's a good thing my batteries last a week or I'd be in trouble. * Telion blinks at the offer, and then holds out his own pack. "Sorry. Want some?" It looks mostly freeze-dried inside. * Ten looks at the Baron. "This isn't going to take a week is it?" That'd be full of suck and fail. ["I shouldn't think so."] Booby trapped dungeon. Easy. Yaaay! This just sounds silly. ["Anyway, if you were here that long, dimensional rewriting would occur by then, so you wouldn't have to worry about that in any case."] BOOOOOOOO! Don't you have any people that are trained to do that sort of junk? [The baron shudders in place, making crackling noises. "Well, it may be silly to you, young entity, but it is the existence or end of all universes as we know them!"] So...we should get to it now, right? ["No, unfortunately. They were all eaten by the structure."] ["Figuratively speaking, of course!"] ...and you're trusting the existence or end of all universes to some people you just met? So now you want us to go get eaten? ["Does it look like I have any choice?"] That's how it works in the movies! * Sayura rolls his eyes. "And that is totally lame. Getting asked to save the universe by Mr. Potato Head. Even lamer than getting asked to save the universe by a teddy bear." ["Oh, you won't get eaten. Probably."] These 'movies' lie. This isn't the movies though this is real life! But...*sigh/shrug* Story of my life. ["The summons was set to find creatures from dimensions that were capable of withstanding the powers of the structure."] Not all of them! Some of them have 'based on real events' right in the opening montage! ["And, apparently, a pool of sauce. It's not conscious, I tested it. So who knows what's up with that."] Maybe it's magic sauce. Someone should try eating it. ["Don't be silly. There's no such thing as magic."] * Telion lifts up his boots slightly. "My boots don't *feel* any more magical." * Sayura sighs, and crosses his arms. "Okay. This structure. What kind of weaponry does it have, and what resources do you have to put at our disposal?" * Ten blinks at the Baron and looks very very confused. ["Well, I'm not exactly sure. No-one's ever got far enough in to report back. Just assume that there will be lots of fire. And perhaps...bread."] Fire... bread... toast? What support and resources do you have? Like, if I melt, I'm so blaming you, kay? * Telion folds his arms across his chest. "These...gene-spliced things. Are we talking chimaeras here? Because that'd suck." Don't hold back, Mr. Potato Head, because this is the end of the universe, as you put it. Chi-what now? You know a lot of weird words. ["And as for resources...I'm afraid we equipped all the first teams with the best of what we had. Until our imported supplies arrive, we have sticks, metal, rocks, lasers, and drop lobsters. Although I'm not sure what good that would do you."] * Telion glances at Kirie. "Mixtures of two creatures. They tried it a little on E3 before it was banned. Too many 'accidents.'" You have lasers? do they work? Are they portable? The future is awesome again! Lobsters? Are the lobsters trained, and can they use the lasers? ...what's a drop lobster? ["Our latest technological innovation, the prototype shark rifle 1.53 known as "Chomp"...was destroyed in the breakout." Anyone paying attention will see tiny drops of water running out of each eye.] (Sharks! With Lasers attached to their heads!) So basically you're sending us in with nothing? Awwwwwwwwww. Fork it over. All of it. I'm fine with what I got on my back. This sounds like the stupidest anything ever. If there's traps, and it's uncharted territory, we need every resource we can get. Yes. But also an *important* stupidest anything ever. ["The lasers work only for a short amount of time. The drop lobster is meant for setting traps. You set one electromagnet where you want it to be, and the lobster comes with another one. At the prearranged signal, the lobster crashes into the other magnet, claws first, dispatching anything in between."] Only important because they're going to kill us! ["All of what we have is at your disposal."] ["Oh, we won't kill you. The universe will."] That sounds like fun! That's a rather good definition of important, now isn't it? * Sayura's eyes glimmer a bit at what the Drop Lobsters do. ["But you won't actually be dead, you see, because you'll never have been alive in the first place."] You brought us to the universe though. How is that different? ["It's not my fault the computer thinks you're qualified to do the job. I'm sure you'll all do fine. You all seem like such...er...talented entities."] Aww, now you're just sucking up. * Ten nods. "I get along awesome with other computers!" You think we're doomed too, don't you? * Sayura suddenly readies into a combat stance, pistol out and on guard. ["Well, think about it this way. Either you're doomed now, or you're doomed in a few days. It's all relative."] Incoming. Yes but if we're doomed, you're doomed too. [A dust cloud appears from over the horizon.] We're so going to save the universe! ["Well, of course, but we were already doomed."] And now you're dooming us! You're a mean head! ["Now, now, it isn't the fault of dooming, but the fa--oh, dear."] * Telion takes a breath and draws his own pistol. It looks like a short-barreled laser with a battery charge in the handle. Now what? Duck? * Kirie draws her nothing because she isn't armed. * Kirie looks down. Are we still in sauce? [No. You've been on dry land since Floomy started moving.] * Sayura suddenly stops. And STARES. Then regains his composure. What is it? ["Did I mention that although the leadership of the rebels has fragmented, splinter groups still roam the area? Ah-heh..."] Is it bees? Nope! You kinda left that bit out. It was assumed. 3 pickles on emus, and another on a rhea. 2 bananas on motor... scooters. Charging us. ...now THAT'S a use of gen-enging my parents never thought of. Bananas don't drive... ["...yes, mea culpa." The baron heads up to Floomy's head again. "And no, no such luck as bees. It is...the porckles."] (Now you just stole my word) The who where? [And now you see just what Sayura's talking about, coming closer. Four amalgamations of pig and piggle--er, pickle--come towards you. Three are riding emus, one is riding a rhea. They are flanking two large floating bananas driving, as he said, motor scooters.] Now that's just dumb. This place is silly. And full of sauce. * Sayura pulls out the sniper rifle and takes aim, looking to headshot the one on the rhea. "Incoming vinegar." I so didn't know bananas could drive scooters. The sauce is back that way. *indicates over her shoulder* * Telion tosses Kirie the ration pack. "You never said whether you wanted some or not." [A stream of liquid shoots out of one of the porckles. Kirie needs a Ranged Def roll!] [And after that, init for everyone.] 2d8+7 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Ten (2d8+7) and gets a natural 9 for a result of 16. 2d8+31 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Sayura (2d8+31) and gets a natural 11 for a result of 42. (d6 or d8?) 2d8+9 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Telion (2d8+9) and gets a natural 12 for a result of 21. (d8) 2d8 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Kirie (2d8) and gets a natural 10 for a result of 10. 2d8+7 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Kirie (2d8+7) and gets a natural 5 for a result of 12. [Kirie is hit by a stream of dill-scented vinegar.] EWW! Ewwww. [Pause.] * Kirie (freezes mid-eww) * Sayura hasn't moved since he started taking aim. He's a good sniper! ^_^v (No. A good sniper would have shot already.) (And brought candy) (What is this waiting for them to get closer business?) [Order: Sayura, Telion, Porckle1, Porckle4, Ten, Porckle2, Kirie, Porkcle3. Porkcle4 is the one with the rhea.] [Aaand go.] (What happened to the bananas?) (What about the bananas? (oops, yes.) (Oh won't you PLEASE think of the bananas?!?) (They both go before Sayura.) (WTF.) (Damn those are some quick bananas) (...bananas with over 42 init? @_@) (It's the motorscooters. Plus eleventeen to init.) (Bleh my beer is warm now. I shoulda drank it faster.) (I've gotta get me one of those moterscooters.) (We all do!) (I'm so grabbing one of those scooters.) [The bananas...approach! On motorscooters! Sayura's turn!] (I'm gonna dual wield them) * Sayura pulls the trigger! Porkle on Rhea fall down? (Motorscooterchucks?) (roll!) (Yo) (Make with the dice!) (Shit the fuck out of that crap!) 2d8-7 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Sayura (2d8-7) and gets a natural 12 for a result of 5. ( By 6. Headshot, yo.) (Do pickles have heads?) (Do porckles?) (All signs point to ask again later.) (This one doesn't anymore.) [The rhea porckle spasms as its top half is blown off, but somehow hangs on. The rhea keeps on coming.] [Telion!] * Telion points his own pistol and glances at Sayura before firing a laser blast at one of the bananas. Since they're getting closer. 2d8-4 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Telion (2d8-4) and gets a natural 7 for a result of 3. [The banana gets clipped pretty good, but keeps on coming. Blue stuff is coming out of the wound.] [One of the porckles on the emu shoots a dill stream at Sayura. Ranged def!] 2d8-2 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Sayura (2d8-2) and gets a natural 15 for a result of 13. ( ... the gods hate me. Fail. ;_; ) ( u smellin = bad ) [BRIIINE for Sayura. It's sticky and wet, but smells more like dill than vinegar and is actually kind of tasty if Sayura is into dill. Or vinegar.] (Or DILLINGER!) * Sayura , even though he just about dodged it, still takes it rather impassively, like he was expecting it. [The rhea seems to speed up exponentially, comes up and swings around, flinging the bottom half of the decapitated porckle at Telion. Dill streams out of its pores. Ranged def for everyone, everyone but Telion can take -2.] (It hit me even with the +4? ;_;) (What?) 2d8 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Sayura (2d8) and gets a natural 8 for a result of 8. (Diminutive, Shar.) (Ten is Tiny!) (And Telion rolls as normal?) (Ten is dimunitive! It means she has no physical strength and has +4 penalty to anybody trying to hit her at range!) (Ack, yes. Turn that +4 into additional -4 on your end, then, Ten) (Sorry.) (Yes, Telion rolls normal.) 2d8-8 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Ten (2d8-8) and gets a natural 11 for a result of 3. 2d8-5 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Telion (2d8-5) and gets a natural 15 for a result of 10. (DR1!) 2d8-5 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Telion (2d8-5) and gets a natural 9 for a result of 4. 2d8 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Kirie (2d8) and gets a natural 13 for a result of 13. [The porckle-half misses Telion and falls to the ground. Its porckle blood splots onto Kirie. Poor Kirie.] EWWWWWWW! It's all sticky! Why does everything have to make me sticky?! [Ten!] ...she's not having much luck with these things, is she? You're a schoolgirl, you should be used to it. Now you're just being gross. >< * Ten waves a hand at one of the scooters and... (I like that its attack was that it bleeds on us.) 2d8-3 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Ten (2d8-3) and gets a natural 13 for a result of 10. * Ten does a great deal of nothing! [Nothing happens. The bananas keep on comin'.] Hey! They're cheating! That's not fair! [The second emu porckle extrudes some sort of long, tendony...do you really want to think about where this came from? And lashes it at Ten.] (Ranged def, -2) Tiny, duck. (Why Ten? Kirie's the tentacle-monster bait.) 2d8-6 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Ten (2d8-6) and gets a natural 11 for a result of 5. (Because it's pickled porkstring, not a tentacle.) * Ten escapes by the length of her nose! (Right on the dot!) (I am not! ><) [Ten does indeed! Kirie's turn!] * Kirie looks around for something big and throwable. (I know you're not Jex, but I'm pre-empting you anyway. You can NOT throw the dinosaur.) ( Mr. Potato Head. You know you want to. ) [There is a rock conveniently situated nearby, though.] (I was gonna.) (He's up high! You can't reach him!) [It's a pretty big rock. And a big pretty rock. At the same time!] Ooh! Pretty! * Kirie runs over and grabs the rock and almost disappears from sight before everyone realizes she just got really tiny. Once she's the size of a mouse she hefts up the massive boulder, hurling it at whatever's nearby and not friendly. 2d8-2 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Kirie (2d8-2) and gets a natural 10 for a result of 8. (And I miss! Yay!) Oh wow! She's smaller than I am! That's so awesome! Odd. They don't mention *that* on the tubes. [The boulder lands next to one of the emus, startling it. Its rider sends a stream of small mushrooms at the party. Everyone a ranged def.] ( Ouch. Mult Def penalties are stacking up. ;_; ) (Now it needs a +6 to hit me) (You know? I've just realized that I forgot to take the penalty for that last one being Ten's second defense of the round) 2d8+6 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Sayura (2d8+6) and gets a natural 12 for a result of 18. (It made its attack by a pretty significant margin.) ( Hah. No. ) (This is my uh third?) (Something like that.) 2d8+4 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Kirie (2d8+4) and gets a natural 12 for a result of 16. (Ha) 2d8+4 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Ten (2d8+4) and gets a natural 3 for a result of 7. * Sayura still hasn't quite recovered from dodging the deathjuice- he's wide open to get mushroomed. ;_; 2d8-1 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Telion (2d8-1) and gets a natural 11 for a result of 10. [Tiny mushroom shower for you all! Sayura and Kirie take the brunt of it though--and their mushrooms explode on contact. The others just get bumped around.] [-15 HP, Kirie and Sayura!] (That's certainly balanced for smaller dice sizes :P ) [The bananas keep on coming. Anyone who looks up to see what Floomy's doing will see it with its head back around on its back, like a duck, eyes squeezed shut. Looks like the dinosaur is a coward.] Gah! They're exploding! Why are they exploding?! (It's 15 HP. You can spare it. :P) [New round start, by the way. And Sayura, who I keep almost calling Sakura!] ( Hoeeee? ) (Your turn.) ( * Taki swoons ) * Sayura doesn't like exploding mushrooms, no he doesn't. His aim went instantly to the mushroom-guy as soon as he recovered- and he fires! ( * Taki looks at the Taki imposter, and then remembers that she doesn't have a spine and teleports away to feel sorry for herself.) (You got no Taki game.) 2d8-5 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Sayura (2d8-5) and gets a natural 5 for a result of 0. (*replaces Taki with WNN Taki*) ( *Taki stabs Taki IN THE FACE. "At least this is one time I know which one's which. DIE BITCH!) (Hey, that rhymes!) ( * Taki dodges cause she is leet invisible ninjazorz) ( Meanwhile, head #2 go boom! ) [The mushroom porckle is shotted. Mushrooms fall out of it, and they explode. Making it explode. The emu stops, looks back at the porckle carcass and discarded mushrooms...and starts eating them off its back. It's no longer running.] [Telion!] (Fear the goth ninja lesbian magical girl powers) (* Taki teleports to where Taki dodge to and stabs her again. "DIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!") ( Neat, I'm not the only one who does that. ) [Two emus, one riderless rhea, and a pair of bananas! What will you do?] * Telion rushes towards the wounded banana, shooting it again! He wants that scooter, dammit! ( The announcer! ) 2d8-5 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Telion (2d8-5) and gets a natural 15 for a result of 10. (DR2!) (...and wrong modifier.) 2d8-4 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Telion (2d8-4) and gets a natural 9 for a result of 5. (Make.) [The banana swerves its motorscooter to the side. The motorscooter catches the beam and...stretches it somehow, or that's what it seems like. The beam disappears.] See! Seeeeee! They so cheat! You bastards! [The first emu porckle sends out another stream, but misses by a mile.] * Kirie her voice is high pitched and squeaky now. Well even more so. * Telion stares. "I guess they do." He holsters the laser pistol and reaches behind his back. (but presumably can't draw until next round.) [The rhea keeps a'runnin'. It spits at you, but is still too far away. Ten!] 2d8-3 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Ten (2d8-3) and gets a natural 6 for a result of 3. (Quick logistical pause, you have not pinged out unless you did.) (*holds onto something just in case*) * Ten accomplishes more nothing!. "Cheating cheaters!" What are you trying to do? Do it better! * Ten point at the scooter. "I can't lift it! It's not fair!" [The emu holding the tendon-lashing porckle draws closer. It lashes its porky pickled tendon at Kirie and...a freak wind causes the tendon to wrap around the porckle itself. D'oh! It loses its balance and falls to the ground. The emu keeps on coming. Kirie!] (Yeah critfails) (Gotta love critfails!) (Can I like grab the emu and hit another emu with it?) (The mushroom one doesn't seem to be paying attention.) (It's not that close yet.) (What is close then?) (More rocks?) [Another rock. Not so big and not so pretty.] Are you guys ready to ROCK?! * Kirie hefts another boulder and chucks it. 2d8-2 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Kirie (2d8-2) and gets a natural 14 for a result of 12. [The riderless emu squawks in return and dodges.] ( Totally a Leena. <_< ) [Round 3! Banans still comin'. Sayura's turn!] ( Which of the porkles are still up? ) (The streaming dill vinegar one.) * Sayura shifts aim to the remaining porkle. The rifle lets out a loud crack! (Also, the rhea is coming into melee range.) 2d8-5 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Sayura (2d8-5) and gets a natural 9 for a result of 4. [Sayura's boomstick makes the porckle go boom! Its emu keeps on comin', though.] [Telion!] (I think Mega Man should fight someone named Emo Emu.) (Does he get wrist blades?) (Oh, be thankful I didn't pull out the Emu Squid.) (Yes, but ironically they only work on himself.) ( SNERK. ) (I wish my grass was emo so then it would cut itself.) (TelionTelionTeliondidRopingagain?) ( Pinging at 0 secs. ) * Telion finally detaches the long metallic strip from his back and squeezes two buttons on the side. The strip immediately folds in and forms an arc, one part where he ends up gripping it. A small circular hole seems like a sight as he draws his fingers between the arc, letting down a crackle of energy as he draws back and fires, a bolt of energy streaming towards that evil banana. If it deflects this, I'll eat my boot. 2d8-9 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Telion (2d8-9) and gets a natural 8 for a result of -1. [The banana does not deflect! The banana gets hit pretty badly! But it's still coming.] [Blue stuff is coming out of it more and more.] YAY! SLINGSHOT OF DOOOOM EFF TEE DOUBLEYOU! Does that even spell anything? (Actually, it looks more like a longbow but sure. ^_^;) And since when are bananas blue? FOR THE WIN! [The banana is yellow, the stuff coming out is blue.] ( Gross. ) (The banana does not coordinate) [The formerly dill-streaming emu comes closer. It spits. Nothing happens.] (I'm pretty sure if you took the peel off a banana you'd still call it a banana.) ( Well. It might be incredible edible blue goo of sugary yumminess! ) (Good, you eat it cause I'm not touching it.) ( It's okay. It's gonna end up 'sploderating all over you anyways. ) [The rhea is in melee range. It pecks at Telion! Melee def, -2] 2d8-5 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Telion (2d8-5) and gets a natural 12 for a result of 7. (Blocked!) (Write it.) (Yes there's some sort of unwritten rule where every sticky liquid has to spill onto the school girl. ><) (Damn shary and her sick fetishes.) * Telion releases the energy string as he takes his hand away and swings the bow to interpose between the beak and him, smacking against it. (Don't judge me!) [The rhea pulls back, stung. It looks hurt and pouty.] [Ten!] (I don't know why wiping off my glasses only seems to make them worse.) (You have sticky hands too?) * Ten looks around for a nail or a horse shoe or a lump of iron or something since the scooters totally cheat. (I'm using a cloth...) * Telion has plenty of metal around him, but would probably be a bad thing to throw. Ten, can you pick me up? (STOP BEING LEENA. <.<) (Constable Swires!) (FASTBALL SPECIAL!) (YOU WATCHED X-3 FAR TOO RECENTLY.) Maybe! Let's find out! * Ten tries to pick up Lee-- Kirie. 2d8-3 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Ten (2d8-3) and gets a natural 13 for a result of 10. (That would be a no) (Write it.) * Ten totally fails to pick up Kirie, but that small rock next to her? So totally floating in the air. "Whups, kinda missed." (Is it really an attack if I'm letting her do it?) (That's a powerusage roll) ( I don't even know anymore.) (That's only for making an attack though...) (I've sunk two CP into that, it's an expensive skill.) (Done with the turn?) (Yep) Well do it better I said! * Sayura mutters something about playing around and ending up dead. I'm TRYYYYYYYING! [The second emu spits. Most of it doesn't connect, but a tiny seed shoots at Telion. He needs a ranged def! Again!] 2d8-1 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Telion (2d8-1) and gets a natural 8 for a result of 7. (Haha. Make second defense! o/~) [The seed swooshes by the side of Telion's face. Lucky Telion! Kirie's turn!] (That seed had the AIDS.) (It had bird SARS!) (In our time, we have a cure for AIDS.) (So they're in range now?) (And SARS. Teh fuchar is awesome.) [The rhea's in melee. Emu2 just got lucky and had a seed in its mouth instead of just saliva. Do you really want to know more?] (So can I grab the rhea and hit the emu with it?) (You can try! +6 for called shot though) (... Kay. Does SS help at all with that?) (For accuracy? No.) 2d8+4 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Kirie (2d8+4) and gets a natural 5 for a result of 9. ( Unarmed/Grapple for the grabbing, then a thrown weapons/ranged/ whatever roll to hit etc? ) * Kirie grabs the nearby rhea by the toe and chucks it at the nearby emu. "Eat stupid bird, stupid bird!" [The rhea flies off with a puzzled "SQUAAAWORK?" It has time for a moment of blissful wonder at the sensation of flying through the air, then crashlands into the big and pretty/pretty and big boulder Kirie had thrown before.] [Round turnover.] Or eat uh rock. I guess. * Kirie shrugs. Rocks are good! [The wounded banana sputters to a stop. The unharmed banana changes course to intercept it. What looks like sentimental discourse takes place...(hold action)] [Sayura!] * Sayura shifts aim to the banana that's not bleeding icky blue stuff all over, waiting for a good shot. He takes it when he gets a steady moment... (Izzat a hold too?) 2d8-5 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Sayura (2d8-5) and gets a natural 4 for a result of -1. [The bullet pings back and forth between the motorscooters before falling to the ground. Oh, critsuccs.] * Sayura stares. .... cheaters. YES! [Also, I forgot to mention, both emus are in melee now too. The third one is still off in the distance, eating mushroom and carcass.] (The bananas are defense and DR whores.) [Telion!] ( Time to bust out the trickshotting. ) ( I don't recall - does Accuracy apply to the self-imposed trickshotting to-hit penalty? ) * Telion runs towards the scooter, jumping past the rhea and yelling as he pulls back the string. "I want that scooter!" 2d8-5 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Telion (2d8-5) and gets a natural 9 for a result of 4. [The unharmed banana jumps in front of the wounded one and takes the shot. It falls over and...] [Both bananas and their motorscooters explode!] (The wounded one yells out "Joooooooooooooe!") [One of the remaining emus pecks at Telion.] [It's a pretty savage peck, yo. Melee Def, +2.] Waaah! The cheating scooters exploded! I so wanted to get one of them for Lukas! ... Did they just explode? 2d8-1 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Telion (2d8-1) and gets a natural 7 for a result of 6. Karma. Why does everything here explode? And/or is sticky? * Telion swings around his bow to deflect the pecking order again. "Aww. I so wanted one of those." [The baron speaks up for the first time since the battle started. "Has to do with the chemical makeup of this dimension. It's worse for the genetic experiments. Because they're experiments."] [The emu is denied! Ten!] (Also, pecking order? :P) * Telion looks up at the baron. "And where have *you* been hiding?" * Ten tries to throw Kirie at the Emu. >.< 2d8-3 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Ten (2d8-3) and gets a natural 5 for a result of 2. (Which emu?) (The emo one.) (Yes) ( "I'm gonna love you and squeeze you and hug you..." ) ["Oh, I have no combative powers, and Floomy is afraid of conflict, so I've been keeping it from going on a mad stampede which would probably have killed you all."] (Okay, so Kirie gets thrown at emu. Is Kirie gonna do anything, or just get thrown?) ...riiight. Sadly, that makes sense. (KIRIE SMASH) (Also...) WHEEE! (But I guess it didn't make too much of a difference since they're already in melee range now anyway...) Eat fists and justice! *pounds on the emu* [In the name of speeding things up, Kirie smashes into the emu that tried to peck Telion. It goes dooooooown. The remaining emu looks around, looks up, goes "SQUAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAORWK!!!" and charges at...Telion again. Man, Telion's just a chick magnet, isn't he?] (A PUN FOR YOUR PUN. And a melee def, +2) (That...was just baaad.) * Ten giggles maniacally. 2d8+3 * Dicesuke throws the bones for Telion (2d8+3) and gets 5, a CRITICAL SUCCESS!!! "I wish I got to hand out more of these, really." (...hah!) (....HA!) (Sooo) (Tel wins like pie) (He so does. @_@) ( Whee! ) (AND I'M NOT EVEN FEMALE!) ( Yet. ) (OR ARE YOU?!) (No. I'm not.) [The emu charges right at Telion, who...sidesteps and flips the bird to the ground! It splits apart, revealing some sort of gun weapon thing.] (Kirie can help you with that...) [END COMBAT OMG.] [Kirie, while smashing into the emu's innards, finds another gun weapon thing.] * Kirie picks herself up out of the squishy mess that was emu head. Ah! Hey! A thingy! * Sayura reloads, and checks over his rifle quickly. * Kirie picks it up, poking at it. * Telion stares and examines the weapon. [The baron seems to jump in excitement, as Floomy tentatively raises its head. "The shark rifles! They survived!"] * Ten points at the weapons. "Ah! Ahhhh! A... Parse. Fail. Please. Hold." The what now? * Kirie experimentally pulls the trigger. ["The prototype shark rifles, our greatest innovation." One of the baron's eyes tears up again. "We had thought they were lost forever..."] ( Third emu dead? ) (Where's Kirie aiming?) (no, third emu eating porckle corpse with mushrooms) * Ten shakes her head. "I could have thrown the birds!? That's so, so, why didn't I try that?" (/shrugs) And were swallowed by giant birds, apparently. You threw me though! Thanks for the assist! No problem! * Sayura looks around for the third emu, spots it eating, then *eyes* Young, Strong, and Pretty with an experimental weapon designed in a universe that's unstable, genetically misguided, and chemically defunct. [Kirie pulls the trigger...and a super fast blue projectile slams into the rest of the emu's body. Upon close examination, it's a small shark enveloped in a blue bubble, chomping away at the dead emu corpse.] NEAT! Can I keep it? Forget it, I'm keeping it. ["Careful! They weren't made with much ammunition! And yes, you can keep it."] * Kirie huggles the gun. ["Perhaps it may help you."] * Telion takes the rifle and tries to find a way to attach it to his many clips. He also presses the button on his bow and sticks it back on his back. The magnets suck it in with a click. ["Now...we must go. Quickly! To the structure! ONWARD, FLOOMY!"] (Also I should have went to sleep two hours ago.) Quite. * Ten points dramatically. "ONWARD!" (This'll be very quick.) Hey Ten, can I ride on you? :D * Telion just walks. Because pointing dramatically is just silly. * Sayura takes the lead. He knows where Floomy's going. (Like 15 minutes quick.) (Bed what?) ( Define sleep. ) (That thing what you do in comfy bed.) * Kirie reaches up her tiny little mouse-sized arms. (Ewww.) * Ten drops down and picks up Kirie and carries her in her arms for a total reversal. (insert more wheeee'ing.) ( * sets fire to the bed* THERE. NO SLEEP FOR YOU. ) [Fast-forward! After several hours of intense trekking and slogging, you reach the structure. It doesn't look all that imposing. Actually, it looks like a Grecian-style series of columns--real ones this time--surrounding a light, airy garden.] * Sayura just has a pistol out. He pauses at the entrance, and takes stock of the rocks, sticks, metal, lasers, and drop lobsters. [The baron gulps, and shudders. "There it is...the structure. I can't watch!" and it dives into a fold of the cloudy skirt Floomy is wearing.] Just to be absolutely clear. Our objective is to get in, get a password or flip a switch, and then what? Watch what? It's not doing anything. * Kirie looks up from Ten's arms. Uh~huh! It's important to know what you're trying to do! ["Oh. Yes, the codes are in the center of the structure. They are...well, you'll know them when you see them."] What do we do with them? Save the universe. Would they be mad if we just smashed our way in? ["Just bring them out here. I called our wellspring technicians, they should be here by the time you finish."] Okay! ["Get in and get out any way you want, just be careful!"] * Sayura nods, then glances at the others. "I hope none of you are afraid of fire." I hope you're not afraid of smashing things. Onward! * Kirie points forward dramatically from Ten's arms. I've dealt with a flaming locked prison-ship re-entering the atmosphere at high speed. *pause* Come to think of it, no I'd rather not remember that. Uh... kinda a little, but I've got Kirie! If this is trapped, let me lead. And if I tell you to do something, DO IT. ["It is very very trapped."] * Sayura concentrates for a moment. "Ready?" (Anyone picking up any sticks, metal, rocks, lasers, or drop lobster kits?) ... But what if you tell us to do something icky? * Sayura has drop lobster kits! Then do it. ... [The lasers are the size of glowsticks, by the way. Looks like a one-shot application laser.] No! (Ten wants somebody else to pick some metal up for her) Because if I'm telling you to do it, there's a damned good reason you should to save your hide, our hides, or not fail at the mission. * Telion shrugs. "If you're leading, you're leading." * Kirie takes sticks and metal and rocks! (Stick plus metal equals SPEAR!) Ready? * Ten puts Kirie back on the ground because she's got a maximum load limit. (I thought stick plus metal was mp3s...) * Kirie takes bunches of stuff because she does not have a maximum load limit. (STICK + METAL = SPEAR) ( In that case, I'm putting stick + metal together to play Lemmings. ) (And when Ten is heavily encumbered, she only moves at half speed.) (Your mom moves at half speed.) (Are you ready?) (And when Ten is heavily encumbered she burns up all her EP and falls out of the sky) (Half the speed of your mom, yes.) (No.) * Sayura is ready, yo. (I'm good to go!) (Good enough! Not ready? Too bad! Here goes!) * Sayura enters, taking the lead. "Flames incoming." Sticky flames? I hope not! They melt you! [And indeed, as they approach, fire springs up from the ground between the pillars and reaches up up into the sky! FIRE! Oh the horror!] * Sayura doesn't bother with an answer to that. If it's not sticky I should be okay. * Telion draws out what looks like a small spray bottle and shakes it up. ( Jet-flame from ground kinda thing? ) (Sheet flame, not jet, but otherwise yeah.) * Kirie sticks the fire good. ( Would TK'ing metal plates cover it up/create an opening? ) [The stick catches on fire. If only she had put a marshmallow on it first.] * Telion covers the jet with foam, spraying at it. Aah! The stick's on fire! The stick's on fire! * Telion also covers the stick, while he's at it. * Ten folds her wings and gathers up her skirts to make herself as small as possible. "Drop the stick! Drop the stick!" (It's not a jet, it's a full sheet. Unless you mean he just sprays along the ground.) * Kirie throws the stick away. (Spraying where there be fire!) [Fire go bye-bye! The path is clear.] Hey neat! * Telion puts the canister away. "Well that was easy." Yay for flame-retardants! * Sayura continues! Onwards! [In the background, you can hear the baron calling behind you. "I told you! You can do it!"] Yay for the future! * Telion walks on, arms behind his back. "I guess I was chosen because I had a fire-extinguisher. Wonder of wonders." (Baron: "I'd be helping you really, but see I have a bad back...") (Also, I'm a potato.) (Least you can see that.) (Mmm...home fries.) (Ba-da-DUM.) (How is the back of the potato different than the front?) (We missed out on a chance for baked potato.) (I'd rather roast leg of Foomy.) * Sayura pauses, then looks up. "Boxtrap coming up. SCATTER!" * Sayura breaks for the left! Scatter where? Which way? * Telion stops. "Box trap?" Wait.. .BOX!? WHERE!? Where's the box? [Suddenly, walls spring up from the ground! They surround you entirely, even the scattering ones. Where "surrounding" doesn't include a top.] * Kirie throws her load up into the air scattering it everywhere. Oh. Here. We're in the box. * Sayura would facepalm, but he's running. He facepalms after he stops, though. Pfft. This is easy. This is a lame box. * Telion looks for a place to climb. * Kirie SMASH NEAREST WALL! [Wall...doesn't smash!? It glows slightly green, though.] Rar! Stupid wall! ... try the lasers. I need to sit down. [The walls are sheer. There's only one part where they're not, and it's slightly indented outward...] [Did I mention no ceilings?] * Telion digs through his side-pack and pulls out a rope and grapple. It's SPACE rope though. "Here goes nothing." Swing swing swing, toss! * Sayura makes a FACE, and rubs his head, like he has a headache. (How high up?) Hey, lemme throw it. You throw like a girl. [The walls are pretty high, though. Higher than Floomy even.] (Did Tel's thingy come up short?) [Ten feels something caught in her clothes.] (yes, it did.) (Yeah. Grapple no catch?) (Yes it did miss that is.) Eh? [It's one of the mushrooms from before! It feels all...glowy.] (And I didn't even get to roll. ;_;) * Kirie takes it after it lands and FLINGS it with all her tiny might. * Ten has... A MUSHROOOM! [Clink, fall goes the grappling hook.] (( Cues White Rabbit up. )) Hey it hit something. That's even more cheating. (Yeah, but that was the wall it hit on the way down.) The side of the wall. Your throw's no better. * Ten lifts it above her head and plays the Super Mario XXXIV noise for mushroom powering up. Unfortunately she doesn't get larger. * Sayura looks at mushroom. Will it explode? My throw was awesome! This place is just dumb. Aww, K, I'll do it! Maybe Ten could lift it. Ten? [The mushroom does not explode. Ten seems to be floating a little higher though...] * Ten pick up the grapple and flies up to her max alt to get a better angle... and then notices that she's still going up. SWEEEEET! Go Ten! Yay! * Ten goes all the way up to the ceiling, still carrying the grapple! Then she tries to go over the wall and to find something to hook it on. [All the surfaces are too sheer to hold a hook, and the edge of the wall is a lot flimsier than its strength suggests.] She made it. Or makes it. *blinks* What do you see? [There's some sort of protrusion further down, but it doesn't look like the rope's going to reach...] Her scaling the wall and pressing a button. * Ten hold the grapple. "You're gonnna haveta climb fast!" Button's on the wall. Oh! * Ten drops the grapple and goes to hit the button. Where? * Sayura calls up, "Let go of the grapple! There's a button on the wall!" Ooh I wanna press the button! * Telion gets bonked on the head with the grapple. "Ow. Hey!" * Ten is so far ahead of Sayura! [Ten push button. Walls go SHOOOMP! And they are gone.] Aww, there goes the box! * Kirie punches the ground where they disappeared to. Stupid walls. ( Walls go down the hooooole. ) Onward! Yay Ten! [The ground dents.] * Sayura rubs his head. "Let's get this over with." * Ten points in completely the wrong direction. * Sayura heads onwards! He doesn't say onwards, though. * Telion coils up the rope again and puts it away. "Good work." He heads onward. * Kirie points too and heads that way before she notices Sayura going another way and changes back to following him. Yay! Thanks! * Ten goes off in the direction that most of the others are going in. Which seems to be that way. After we get out of here I'm gonna treat you to ice cream Ten! Oh wait you don't eat... * Kirie frowns. Well what do you like? That'd be totally awesome if.. Yep! * Sayura sighs at something. I like games! Any of you good at navigating mazes? Nope! [Uh oh MAZE!] [That is to say, there is a maze in front of you. A covered one, unfortunately.] I'm real fast and can make maps as I go! I can make them into a straight line though. [Walls go up to the ceiling. They do not, however, glow green.] (Kirie smash?) I'm pretty good at navigation. Usually by stars though... * Kirie goes and smashes the nearest wall. (I was typing that :P) [It falls. Only in your imagination does it say "ow."] Which way? Or we could just cheat. To the center! Kay! * Kirie smashes to the center! I guess! Right now that's straight ahead. (Also I NEED to go to sleep. >.>) * Sayura lets the Incredible Hulk clear the way. "Straight." (Your 15 minutes is long up.) (Sleep is a crutch) (I know, I know) (Sleep will keep me from crashing on the way to work.) (there's *one* more thing after this.) (Another 2 hours of combat!) [Straight it is! The walls fall, and in front of them there is a small pad lying on a pedestal...] (10 more minutes, and I drop. Just warning you.) Ooh! Mine! * Kirie runs over and grabs it. * Sayura shoots just in front of Kirie. "WAIT!" WHAT?! I betcha it's trapped and gonna drop a huuuuge rock on us! * Sayura also shoots before she starts to move. Nyah. * Kirie stops and jumps up and down impatiently. I can take a rock. I'll punch it right in the face. [Sayura stops Kirie just in time. A rain of large passion fruits falls to the ground where Kirie would have been and explodes. They melt into the ground, leaving a heart-shaped hole.] * Kirie looks up. [The hole's not too big to go around, though.] Is there more? Geez. Everything really DOES explode here. Rock, I said rock, not fruit! But we're the ones with the rocks. * Sayura concentrates for a moment. "Nothing else in store." So I can get the thingy? Yes. Yay! * Kirie runs over and grabs it for reals this time. Don't break it. No promises. Yeah! That's, like, the whole universe! We've got to deliver it to their techs. I'll do it! * Kirie starts running back out of the place. * Ten points to the hole Kirie left in the maze. "OUT!" Hey! Wait up! OUTWARD! * Ten flies after her. * Sayura follows at a more sedate pace, holding his head the whole time. Race you! Kaay! * Telion walks leisurely too, arms behind his back. He seems to be whistling. * Kirie grows back to normal size so her stride's longer. [And so, the temporary protagonists left the deathtrap structure. Hurray! Outside is waiting a Floomy, a baron, an apteryx, a snake, and pterodactyl.] * Kirie runrunruns! * Ten flyflyflies! Hi! We won! Yay! We so did! [The baron is cheering loudly. "I knew you could do it! You've saved us all!"] [The apteryx wakes up and looks around sleepily.] And us all too. So we won't not-exist. Or something. Here! Here! * Kirie hands over the thingy triumphantly. [The snake takes it.] Well, thank goodness that's over. So do we get like riches and stuff? I kinda like existing. I expect we get a memory wipe and a safe trip home. Awww Then Kirie can't buy me games! But but then I'll forget all about you guys. * Kirie sniffle. Thankfully. [The snake goes over to the apteryx and bops it on the head. The apteryx falls unconscious again, and the snake pulls out some sort of doohickey and starts tapping in codes.] You couldn't visit anyways. If you're from the past. Well, we can't give you anything permanent, really, and whatever you did get would only last for until you were sent back. And Earth. I think it's a good hundred light years away. I know it's only been a couple hours, but I really think I can call you all my very best of friends. But for what it's worth, we're all very grateful to you. I'm Dr. Mensot, and I'm honored to know you. ...you must not have many friends. It's only because we were forced together by necessity of saving the universe that we didn't abandon you to the vegetables. Thanks! You're my friend too! I'd add you to my list, but it's kinda not gonna last, you know? [Mensot goes over to the snake and starts arguing with it.] I have lots of friends! Everyone else gets to run away from you. What now are you from Ten? Maybe I can make you a time capsule! [They manage to reach a consensus, and the apteryx...SPLITS APART! Revealing a strange sort of flat, round apparatus on the back of four tiny elephants on top of a turtle. One of the elephants trumpets questioningly.] Like, "do not open until 2062?" Yeah. That'd be awesome! [The snake slips the pad into the apparatus, which eats it with a faint burping sound. Nothing happens, but Mensot and the snake check readouts, nod, (close the apteryx up again) and start moving away. (The apteryx starts to snore.)] Well, now that's over, you wanna go get pizza? [They wander off into the sunset. Or whateverset.] I know! * Telion starts to speak, then stops, "Huh." You have to do that! Nobody would ever believe me! You so have to! I so will! Yay! You know where Japan is? Yeah! Most of me was built there! Neat! [The baron speaks up again. "You should be returned to your proper dimensions shortly. However, because of the lag, if you wish to stay for a few more hours, I can issue you all free gift certificates for a rack of lamb at our most renowned restaurant!"] Well I'll bury it at *random address at random park* ["After those few hours, you will once again disappear."] It'll be the best box EVAH! ...I'm in no hurry. .... sure. Why the hell not? I have to get back and find out what Kirie left me! Ew! I don't want to eat a lamb! Now! I gotta leave her something! Yeah! [The baron hops down and rummages in Floomy's outfit. Small strips of paper float out to you all. "And my most sincere thanks for your service to the universe."] Anytime! GoGoGoGoGoGo! [Floomy starts moving towards you. The baron wobbles. "Floomy! No! Stop right this instant!"] * Telion shrugs and picks up a certificate and walks off. It's gonna eat us! * Sayura moves away from the large dinosaur. ASAP. [And the Floomy SLUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURPS at you all.] EWWWW! I've got more sticky stuff on meeeee! Why with the sticky! >< ["Accursed entity! How many times have I told you to keep your thank you slurps to yourself! Back, back I say!" Floomy reluctantly moves back and smiles instead of slurping.] (Aw, it's just saying thank you! for not unexisting it!) (Didn't we reexist it?) ["...of course, our bathing facilities are also at your disposal." The baron sighs.] (I'm going to sleep.) * Sayura sighs. And gets licked. "... though before I eat anything, I'm getting a bath." * Sayura stalks off. Weirdos. * Kirie jumps up in the air and gives the camera a V! For some reason. [END.]